The Uselessness of an MBA

This post is very apt, since I finished my MBA for all practical purposes a couple of days ago. Yay!

When I was watching Die Hard 4, it certainly struck me, how useless MBAs really are. I mean, imagine New York is under siege, the last thing you are likely to hear around the streets are: “You are an MBA, do something!”

Of course, we are overpaid, and incapable of doing pretty much anything but writing long and wordy paragraphs and saying a lot of gobbledygook, which nobody understands (including the person who writes or says it). And the most you would expect out of us, during something like the situation in DH4, would probably be to remove our cufflinks and put them in our coats, in case they fall off in the ensuing melee.

You don’t believe me? Watch the video below.

That’s one of us when he thinks his wife is cheating on him. Imagine him in Die Hard 4.

~

(Scene: The siege of the US begins. There is a sudden blackout in the city. A team-leader somewhere was touching up the vision statement of his 3-man team. His screen suddenly blacks out.)

TL:Holey Comoley! (calls up the Technical Support guys.)
Tech Support: Yes sir?
TL: My monitor just blacked out!
Tech Support: Yes sir, the entire Western Grid is down. We don’t expect anything to happen for the next 24 hours…. not atleast till Bruce Willis rams a 4WD in the baddies you-know-what.
TL: I don’t care whose problem it is. I want to finish my job. My P/L is being hit.
Tech Support: But sir,…
TL: Look, we are going through a subprime crisis anyway, and you certainly don’t want to be part of the latest downsizing do you?
Tech Support: (Rolling his eyes) No, sir
TL: Then get it done.
Tech Support: (Puts the phone down, camera closes up onto his face. It is of all people, Bruuuce Willis!)

~

I should not be allowed to write movie-scripts.

~

Speaking of which, there was a threat of a strike by the movie industry in Karnataka the other day, because.. guys, you might want to sit down, because they want a tax-break on remakes. Can you believe it? A tax-break on a high-potential crappy movie. Think about it, do you know how much pain a crappy movie costs?

You spend about Rs. 200 bucks on the Kannadiga version of Jodaa-Akbar, and you spend a tortuous 4.5 hours in air-conditioned comfort watching with glazed over eyes, Udupendra romancing a random actress, in between saving India and his son from wicked people with the help of tacky special effects. You come out of the theatre what is first thing you are going to do? Jump off the fourth floor right? Slit your wrists, bleed to death while crying out the pain in your head? Worse? See! QED.

Last heard, they aren’t going on strike. God bless. You’ll need it.

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One response to “The Uselessness of an MBA

  1. nice blog…the look’s good…sorry for the misplaced comment…its too late in the night for any morsel of sanity inside me to prevail…liked most of it…the EMI thing still figures to me as Induction…very personalized…yet caters to the readers expectations…
    btw…what was your percentage in college?
    ciao…thanks for taking the time out to read this crap…:P

    au revoir!

    Achint
    ’06-’10
    DCE

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